Thursday, July 15, 2010

To submit to Lamebook, or not to submit?

Do you all know about Lamebook? A friend from work first told me about it when we were internet deprived at a training this summer, and while it's often raunchy and completely offensive, it's also sort of shocking in a trainwreck way. Like that Housewives of New Jersey show.

(Don't you get the distinct impression that they photographed them one by one and them shopped them together, because they'd never actually stand that close to each other without ripping each other's hair out? But I digress.)

Today, an old friend posted a Facebook status about her children's poo. It included information from not just one of her children's poo, but both of their poo. It was gross. It was shocking. It was borderline-fecophiliac. And sure, it was an overview of events that actually took place, but does that make it OK to post on FB?

Now I'm torn because the post itself is perfect for Lamebook. And if she's willing to share her story, shouldn't others out there benefit from its foulness? This is really a philosophical question for the social media age.

In the meantime, I'd like to propose
A couple recommended guidelines in regard to Facebook status posting:

1. Save the stories about children's (or adult) bodily functions for the doctor. We've all seen the book Everybody Poops, and it works best as a generalization, not a detailed account.

2. After more than two alcoholic beverages, refrain from posting anything to FB, period. Your inner concept of what is funny and what is depressing may be askew. Wait until the morning. While we're at it, step away from any phone, texting device, or camera.

3. Unless the goal is to stir things up, avoid the topics your mama said to avoid on a first date: money, politics, religion.

4. Read the entire status update out loud-- can it be read without gasping for breath? If not, it's probably too long.

5. Save the "LOL"s for an IM conversation.

I'm sure there are other good rules for writing FB status updates. Please comment, if you want, so we can add to them. For everyone's sake!

P.S. As of now, I haven't submitted my old friend's horrific status to Lamebook. What do you think? Would you submit it, if you were in my place?

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